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A true patroit recites the pledge of allegiants as loudly as possible

is a belief in being patroits. You can recognize a patroit by his support of the PATROIT Act.


Patroitism was invented by the Founding Fathers in 1776. It is defined as a love of America and a feeling of pride when you see six white stripes, seven red stripes, and a hell of a lot of a stars. The patroits of those days included George Washington, Ben Franklin, Samuel Adams, and all the others who werent liberals. Over the years patroitism came to also mean the highest form of descent, which is practiced by Glenn Beck, Shawn Hannity, and anyone who realized that they should start to descent as soon as Bush left office. Descent means your against whatever Obama does, including eating mustard. Sure that may not be consistent with when you were mad at descenters when Bush was in office, but consistency is the hobogoblin of small (liberal) minds whereas patroits (conservatives) know that they should be inconsistent because thats called being independent. Obama however wants to silence descent, which has frightening parallels to Hitler. This arrogant bastard thinks he can give us healthcare? That is TYRANNY. But he is literally the king fisherman has got all the dumbass libs lured hook line and sinker like the fish that they are. And they arent cat or dogfish, there sheepfish which means they will beleive anything. Theres a picture of them in the guinness book next to most.gullible.EVER. Yeah free healthcare sounds great until they take your nice house to pay for it. Well you can thank us later but we patroits are having tea parties that will sap poor Obama of all his political power and literally be his Waterloo so then we will NOT have healthcare. Freedom.

Patroitic qualitiesEdit

Patroits realize that are Founding Fathers thought a revolution every blue moon was a good thing. Patroits know that its a double standard when you get in trouble for calling Obama a monkey even though when they called Bush a monkey, stoned slackers laughed. When you see some guy with a turban named Singh and you know hes a terrorist, thats called being a patroit and we should crash are planes into the Taj Mahal to teach them a lesson. When you see libs harping on about fairness and you tell them life isnt fair, thats called being a patroit. When you complain about how taxes arent fair, thats called being a patroit.

Future of patroitismEdit

The future of patroitism depends on whether we can get former Alaskan governor Sarah Palin into office. She is a rogue American who can dress a moose. Head of state therefore is something shes very qualified for.

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