225px-Janet Reno-us-Portrait-1-

What a liberal might look like

Janet Wood Reno (born July 21, 1938) is the former Attorney General of the United States under Bill Clinton. He is remembered best for committing genocide against the people of Waco and for looking like a turkey.

Early life Edit

Reno's father was a Danish immigrant and a police reporter. Reno's mother was an investigative reporter. Together they taught Reno how to be a member of the liberal media. Reno was a debate champion and valedictorian of his high school, afterwards he went to Cornell and majored in chemistry. He then went to Harvard Law, after which he became an attorney. Clinton then named him the Attorney General.

War on Freedom Edit

As Attorney General, Reno declared a War on Freedom, despite the fact that only Congress can declare War. Reno knew that he had to destroy anyone who beleived in freedom because they were threat to the liberal establishment. This included the Montana Freemen, Branch Davidians, and anyone else who believed in personal responsiblity and the free market. So he went to Helena Montana and brought a bunch of feds and they arrested them all for trying to have rights. Then it was time for Waco.

Waco Edit

Leading up to the Waco Siege, the Branch Davidians did NOT want to fight and did everything in there power to avoid a standoff. David Koresh even sent valentines to Reno, but Reno rudely ripped them up and sent the order to kill every man woman and child. It was literally the Alamo.

Post-political life Edit

Reno ran for governor of Florida but did NOT win and had to leave in shame. He was buried by the local media i.e. the Boca Breeze. Today he lives a quiet life with his cats.

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