Brokeback Mountain is an AMERICAN movie by Japanese director Ang Lee (Chinese: 一瞬千撃..天, Simplified Chinese: 王家衛, Chinese for Dummies: 정지훈).  It is the story of two MEN who become bros and NOTHING more.  They are NOT gay.  Brokeback Mountain lost the 78th Annual Teen Choice Award to Crash, which is my favorite movie because it proves that white guilt liberals are the REAL racists and just because I say the "N word" (how come they can call me a cracker and thats ok btw?) doesN'T mean I'm a racist.  Randy Quaid won a Golden Globe for his role.

Plot Edit

One day Jack Gyenosihdfnl wandered into a town that was in the middle of a gang war.  On one side was The Joker and on the other side was The Man Holding A Fake Arm (hereby known as TMHAFA).  Jack Gynecologist walked right up to DNRTFA and said "cooper prepare a coffin" he said looking at his sword.  He then cut DNRTFA's fake arm off (with his sword).  The Joker was intrigued.  He walked right up to Jack and was like "Do you know how I got these scars?" Jack thought for a second and said "Yes" hoping he wouldN'T have to listen.  The Riddler was intrigued (again) and told Jack he knew where they could find some Confederate (FTW) Gold and offered him a spot as his .  Jack agreed to join Batman's gang.  Together they literally ran (good movie) the town and became VERY close (literally).  They were best bros until Jack tried to have sex with The Joker...'s wife.  The Joker forced Jack to have a duel even though he did NOT want to.  After an the most epic walk off in the history of ever Jack killed The Joker with his sword.  The Joker exploded in blood and the noob samurais were all happy but Jack was NOT because he just killed his best bro to death.  As he lie dying, the Joker said to Jack "do you know how I got these scars?" Jack answered, "yeah i just cut you with my sword." "Oh, right" the Joker said looking at the sword Jack had just thrust inside him (NOT a metaphor).  Jack was put on trail even though he was just defending himself (Welcome to Obama's America).  Everyone remembered what happened differently.  So they performed a sayance and summoned Rob Pilatus, who claimed to have had sex with both of them.  Jack was executed for homosexuality (that's one thing Iran got RIGHT).

Symbolism Edit

Director Akuma Kurosawa claimed the movie was an allegory for the atomic bomb.  He has been quoted at saying "they pretty much all were."  Well I guess I just didn't "get" it.  Do you think Truman woke up that morning and said "I wanna kill hundreds of thousands of innocent people."  War is hell.

War is Hell Edit

It is.

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